Insight in the life of a stick stuck in the mud

In life, as a person we ought to have morals. It serve as a intrinsic compass of sorts if you would like. Perhaps on a clear day with obfuscation out of the way, a compass might be thrown away out of lack of necessity. However there are days when we are heady, consumed with uncertainty and bogged down by dilemmas. It is during such times when you take out the good 'ol compass and this is when it really shines.

Morals as guiding principles, so as to speak, i suppose you wouldn't fancy them as shifting sands would you? More of rigid values that help you to stabilise things abit and allow you to define the paradigm of whatever problems you are dealing with. Conceptually this idea is sound, isn't it? You are confused and this is much like an idiot-proof way to get yourself out of sticky situations.

Well i used to champion so. Till God came around and gave me a pointer.

When you entrench yourself too deeply in some random place, you basically have kicked yourself in the butt when you realised that you have to evacuate. I forgot that the world is dynamic. I forgot like a kelong flexing in the wishy washy currents of the sea, one has to learn to be flexible in ever changing circumstances. Else off you go, snap like a stubborn birch in a gale.

As a child i was conditioned to hate smoking. I adduce that this has partly got to do with the fact that i never got to see my maternal grandfather because he passed away due to lung cancer as a result of tobacco. As the days rolled by, my intolerance for smoking built up to such an extent, i effectively became an extremist.

And one fine day, God threw me into a platoon in Army filled with smokers. He cheekily inserted an 2WO Johnson Quek of whom i looked upon as a fatherly figure and to whom i am still deeply indebted. He pops cigarettes like a child would with candies. Am i supposed to loath someone of whom i am indebted to? No. Absolutely not, it is preposterous. I realise that if you are too anal about some things namely principles, it makes it very awkward for you to reconcile with a renewed position.

And thats not all that God did. He sure is a jolly good fella (Hey God i dont mind you throwing me some cash for a change! Throw cash but not just change okay :D) He gave me someone whom i fell deeply in love with and then as it turned out, she was a smoker. I just couldn't say "Off you go, i wouldn't hug a ash tray."

What did transpired later on is that i found myself immersed in a conundrum. On one hand, i thought that inaction on my end would literally mean that i am watching my loved one being sent to their death. See their her life slowly wafting away through the emanating plumes of tobacco smoke couldn't have been a more apt description. And on the other hand, i saw an individual who should have her rights vested onto herself as a matter of personal choice. And action taken on my end who mean that i have infringed on it, an inalienable suffrage to all of humanity. And after much mulling. i decided that inaction is the best approach i can think of.

Life is so dynamic, so fluid that anything can and will happen given a chance to do so. It puts you in wretched conflict. I loved running but the doctors have told me that i ain't suppose to run too long. I like seafood but i have gotten seafood allergy. I like the medical profession but i turned my back on it. Sometimes it seem that i am making my life into a life of irony. I never started out to make irony as the main theme of my life, it just happened.

So whether morals should remain affixed as rigid principles or shifting goalposts, i think i would have to spend some time mulling over that for some time.