I really don't understand myself. I like being left alone. In fact, i have a strong streak of independence in me which causes me to shun groupwork sometimes. You could even say that i dislike company sometimes.
But if this is so then why am i feeling an acute sense of loneliness? Why do i feel this pain resonating through my heart? I yearn to find a friend to talk to because i am bored beyond all words. I really really want someone to talk to. But then again, why do i feel a strange urge to just walk away from my friends and impose a self-exile?
Have i lost touch with what i really want? Thinking that what my mind dictates must indeed be what my heart desires? Oh man... i'm getting a bit confused here...
1 comment:
I am also confused of what you say, yet I think I somehow understand, confusing rite?
I think the reason why u dun want to come is because:
1.) You did not do what you really want in the outing, as a result, feeling restrain.
2.) Before coming out, you are already not in the right condition to come out, as a result, you become unhappy in the end, then make u think that outing will not solve ur unhappiness and blah blah, then u dun like to come out.
There can be many reasons but i am sure that you do not hate company, it is about the outing itself, and you definitely.
I think you really have to find about it, otherwise you will become and feel worse than now. Something when we go out, you need to accomodate to others, and for that, you need not feel pain and sad. I think you are assertive enough to cause changes that suit and favour ur way. Think about it!
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